There is no spoon; 20% chance of spork in the afternoon: more random bits

I’m trying to arrange a theatrical showing of “Iron Sky” at the AMC 20 in Tulsa, 7:30PM September 27th. It might be the only chance you get to see moon Nazis on the big screen they so richly deserve. You can check out the trailer and reserve seats at http://www.tugg.com/events/1458#.UDzJ78FmTMq . If you know filmfans that are into quirky indie sci-fi action adventure camp comedy, pass the word along.

In other quirky indie news, Bigfoot Hoaxer vs Teenage Drivers ends badly for the hoaxer. The Bigfoot Liberation Front vows revenge.

Electric blue noctilucent clouds. Didn’t they open for The Dead in Austin in ‘72? I have all their albums, man!

Neil Armstrong would never knowingly have had anything to do with Erik Von Däniken.

Hey, wave power will finally get a go here in the USA.  Catch the waves with this classic “that’s so stupid I can’t believe you just said that” moment with Bill O’Reilly.

No lion spotted in Essex. Maybe it was a cheetah instead?

Reflections on mirrors in folklore and superstition.

Candy, man? A stranger that offers you candy isn’t automatically a nice person. You must carefully consider the type and quantity of candy before going any further in the negotiations.

The next time you think about “finding yourself”, think of this.

Who says there’s no justice? “Free cellphones for spammers! No contract!”

Holy relics, Batman! The Skidmarks of the Blessed St. Elvis go to auction.

Proof again that drugs are wasted on the young. Or should I say…  sex & drugs & rock & roll?

There it is! I was waiting for Pat Robertson to suggest that his deity had moved Isaac further west to protect the GOP convention in Tampa. Sorry, New Orleans! You can’t blame Pat or his invisible friend if you guys keep worshiping Baal!

In Pat’s honor, here’s the best Skittles ad ever, starring John Bolton.

Speaking of building Arks, didja know that Noah ran a methane biomass converter for cooking, heating and lighting? “All hands to the poop deck!”, as they used to say. It’s been downhill for the luxury floating zoo industry since.

Born in the USA: Nothing says “patriot” like murder and treason. Shaving your head and living with men can lead to this.

IOIYAWSF (It’s Okay If You’re A Wall Street Fascist):  story of another failed fascist coup plan… to oust FDR. The late, great George Seldes gives us his contemporary take on it here  (his book “Witness to a Century” is a must read).

Haggis, anthrax and a lethal attitude:  Gruinard Island and the indigenous Scottish terrorists, the SNLA. The kilts were just a diversion!

Maybe there’s a strange reason for why we have Paul Ryan for VP and not Chris Christie:  firms that underwrite municipal bonds or advise state pension systems can’t contribute to a candidate that has any influence, directly or indirectly, in selecting pension investment advisers or bond underwriters. I don’t know why we even have a law like that after the Citizens United ruling. It just seems so unfair!

Lyndon LaRouche, America’s crazy uncle, is still alive and kicking and ready to build Earth some mighty planetary defenses! Why isn’t he running this year? (Oh, yeah, the federal rap, right!) This guy makes Ron Paul look like Casper Milquetoast.

So much for your buddy having your back: unlike humans, chimps only punish when they’ve been personally wronged. Maybe that’s why we’re here and they’re there: we’re much better at being vindictive in groups.

Meet the neutristor: the world’s smallest non-radioactive neutron generator.  It sounds even neater than it really is, but, hey, you gotta have switchable neutron sources, right?

Robert Krulwich’s December 2010 letter from Neil Armstrong (RIP) about the first Moon landing.

Honda unveils the Miimo robot lawnmower. Jane, stop this crazy thing!

Face it, we’re just fat slobs. Hunter-gatherers have much the same energy output as “cube potatoes”.

The gamut of logical fallacies indexed in one convenient website.

A newly published scientific paper on how moral evaluations shapes the landscape of belief.

Droughts are good news for pot busters. Like shooting fish in a hookah.

To hell with the rich folks. Jack Hitt says it’s the amateurs that are the job creators.  Do what you love and the people with money will follow?

It’s Morse code on Mars: Curiosity rover leaves its designers’ signature wherever it goes.

He’s not a self-made man… yet. But he’s getting there.

Russians inside NORAD??? But, but… they’ll see the Big Board!

Looks like Syrian rebels are getting better at playing “pin the AAA on the warplanes”. UAVs get a new bit of miniature nasty to throw at humans in return.

How not to do business in Mexico or in Oklahoma.

Tax increase in Lubbock? OK, fine, as long as you don’t use it to start an insurrection!

Happy anniversary, Nawlins! Oh, er, never mind.  So, like a total putz, Rep. Raul Labrador (not a made-up name) urges withholding hurricane disaster aid. It was so funny, I forgot to laugh and point! A modest proposal: we drop him into the middle of the Gulf with a large gash on his leg, let nature sort things out.

Here in the USA, they don’t need no stinking warrants, while in Sri Lanka they are hiring a hangman.

How did Rep. Todd Akin get so smart, you may wonder? Dedicated research, that’s how!

“Bad press” exists: the RNC did eject the two racists that were dumb/drunk enough to harass a CNN staffer. Good call, though they still have problems with their ‘albedo’.

Bill Nye begs you not to make your kids stupid because we need smart kids to fix the mess we’re making now.

Kentucky still prefers blissful ignorance to science. I only pick on them because they made their kids stupid and their postal abbreviation is “KY”.

Giant pre-historic sperm. Not a reference to Rep. Todd Akin.

“Coke weebles” wobble but they don’t fall down! Finally, something or someone Lindsay Lohan didn’t do!

Calypso 58 of Bokonon :

I wanted all things
To seem to make some sense,
So we could all be happy, yes,
Instead of tense.
And I made up lies
So that they all fit nice,
And I made this sad world
A par-a-dise.

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